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today

today is birthday

it lonely

people celebrate thing I never had

many say autistic not care this things

.

some don’t

I care

it matter because never have

because something special to other people but I not know why

how can understand something never have if not explain

.

very few remember birthday

few that remember be nice not upset talk about too much

it just another day

.

other day was four years since have stroke

four year ago was in hospital

if not covid I be hospital now

.

everything hard

I alone

I not understood

I sad and tired

.

all want is see my love

be in arms again

sleep next to

.

nothing feel safe

Disability

Keep Going

I don’t know what to say. It is hard. My life has changed in big ways. I can’t do many things I used to. I try not to sleep. I don’t know I will wake up. I want to live.
I have dreams. I have goals. I am a person.
I don’t like be inside. I don’t like be in bed not moving pain. This not the life I want but it the life I have now and it still worth more.
I have stories to tell. I want world to know world to see.
I don’t want be another number lost and forgotten.
everyday I am calling from my heart see me hear me don’t let me die don’t let me die please please don’t let me die.
I want to see my loves. I hold hope. even if others can’t.
I am here. I won’t go without a fight. I will leave things on fire just like I have been all my life.

if you still here even if you can’t believe know this. I think you are extraordinary amazing. You matter you are worth the world. I hold hope in me for me for you for everyone. I will carry in me the beauty. You are loved. You are important. You are valuable.

keep going a second a minute a day. Keep going.

Jay

Written with Unity 144